medical negligence

I have left hippocampal sclerosis ( atrophy) Massive white matter frontal lobe lesions, Cluster seizures , aphasia, TBI and seizure disorder. On going seizures I cannot get a primary care doctor , no specialty care doctor or provider to see me and veterans affairs won't pay for anymore testing Pre sleep stages abnormal eeg age 9 Over the last 5 year's only had 4 eegs now thier is no more healthcare and my neuorological conditions cause my brayicardia , asthma , low blood sugar and I guess I just dont understand how so many people could hurt me and black ball me for being a disabled to the point where I cannot put into words how sick I am and what they did to me to. . lieing saying I have no disablilties and health problems for these other young adults who families let thier children hurt me because theier work in the judicial system , fire dept ,police force ECT. when i was in my childhood I was in medical foster care for tbi because my father traveld for business alot and his political career my mother was never thier and she was diagnosised with munchuzen by proxy at the Swedish cherry hill campus in seattle Washington along with this my mother helped all these colored people that commited really racist and cruel hate crime multiple times later in adult hood in Juneau alaska to get away and reward for injuring( a life(my life )Caucasian female and a combat veteran who had a. Early childhood Traumatic brain injury at age 3 ; where what I want now is to have a gender reassignment surgery I cannot conceptualize it any more in any context my brain. Injury , siezures and autism is making me so sick I hurt A lot on the inside that they choose me to be thier scarifice What do i do