Confused! Need help for 8 yo daughter -- recently diagnosed and worsening memory/attention

Our daughter began having gelastic (laughing), complex-partial seizures (originating in right temporal lobe) out of the blue around September/October 2013, at the age of 7.  The seizures were fairly regular each evening and also at times during the school day.  She went to the hospital and was put on Trileptal, which seems to have controlled the seizures.  However, since this started, her processing speed, focus, and memory have spiraled downward.  It has become substantially worse in the last few months.  We have noticed times where she is just "not all there" and nonresponsive.  Studying for tests has become a nightmare because we can study the same thing 100 times and she will act later like she's never heard it before.  She has gone from straight A's to D's and F's.

We became concerned that she may be having absent seizures, which are impacting her memory.  So, her doctor ran a regular (~2 hour EEG).  The technician told me she had 3 or 4 seizures during the test.  The EEG showed several (every ~5 minutes while awake and 20-30 seconds while asleep) sharp spikes of abnormal brain activity from the right TL.  She was non-responsive and unable to recall information stated during each spike.  Later, the neurologist told me she did NOT have seizures but was "just" having abnormal spikes.  So, she ordered another EEG, though, this time it was an ambulatory EEG for 24 hours.  She was relatively well rested before and during this EEG, as she wasn't doing school work or running around like normal, given that she was hooked up to machines.  So, I wasn't surprised that I didn't notice anything alarming during the EEG -- her seizures and fogginess really come in when she's working hard or active.  The doctor just called to tell me that she was again "just" having spikes but not seizures.  So, they don't think there is anything in her epilepsy causing her memory issues.  They told me to just talk to her pediatrician and ask for classroom accommodations.

This just DOESN'T make sense to me.  If the spikes in her previous EEG were accompanied by memory failures and nonresponsiveness, how can there NOT be a correlation between her memory problems and her epilepsy?  And what exactly is the difference between a spike and a seizure?!?!?  Has anyone ever dealt with this or other similar issues related to memory?  I'm very frustrated, as it seems that the doctor is dismissing her problems as a mere behavioral issue and not a medical one.  I'll admit that there could be some behavioral issues at play here.  But I'd be shocked if that's all this is....  Please help!!!!